LGBT dating: Life & love before and after dating apps

In the last century, society and culture have changed at an incredible pace. Many of us are lucky enough to live in a brave new world. For queer folks, while a lot of ground remains in dispute and hatred still runs amok, many new options exist.

Online dating and free dating sites have changed the dating game fundamentally for queer people. Social pressures have marginalized and shamed LGBT dating in many forms through the centuries, relegating it to a dirty secret. This has driven a need for privacy and security that has defined LGBT communities for ages.

The abundance of LGBT-friendly dating sites has forever changed the dynamics of LGBT dating. But it’s important to never forget the history and the context that it comes from.

Life and love of LGBT before and after dating apps

LGBT dating: The historic perspective

The history of LGBT dating is obscure and often hard to pin down. LGBT communities have been persecuted or marginalized in countless ways throughout history. Their footsteps have been erased both by their oppressors, silencing their voices, and by themselves, seeking protection in secrecy.

Ancient Rome

A favorite of armchair historians, Ancient Rome is an often-cited example of the historic prevalence of queer people. But there’s more nuance to the story than what people tend to bring up. While (male) homosexual relations were common in Roman bathhouses, the perspectives of ancient Romans weren’t as progressive as we’d like to think.

While active partners were seen as powerful and masculine, passive actors were seen as weak and effeminate. They were often subjected to abusive power dynamics and culturally normalized, drastic age differences. Attitudes towards female sexuality were so dismissive that records of female homosexuality don’t even exist.

Victorian England

Back in Victorian times, social attitudes towards LGBT folks had made no great strides. Still, the community is crafty, and the many technological advances of the time were put to good use. With the widespread acceptance and distribution of newspapers in cities came the personal ads industry.

LGBT folks capitalized on personal ads, using coded language and secret words to recognize each other. Right under the nose of restrictive Victorian society, LGBT people found and loved each other. And to do so, they made use of the infamous Molly houses, reprieves from a punishing social environment.

20th Century

In the 20th century, the advent of human rights, civil rights, and other struggles began to redefine society. Still, LGBT folks had to continue hiding throughout the world, facing treatment as mental patients, deviants, and criminals. LGBT people sought refuge in their communities, creating underground networks for anything from partying and flirting to social activism.

It was perhaps the brutal repercussions of the 80s HIV crisis that forced the community out of the woodwork. Embracing the visibility, a brave generation of activists created the pride movements that laid the groundwork for the modern era. Many good people lost their lives so we could live in a world where free dating is possible for all.

LGBT romance in modern times

A lot of progress has happened since the 80s. The 90s saw an influx of queer representation across all sorts of mainstream media. Major syndicated TV shows like “Will & Grace” helped to normalize gay relationships and love to an entire generation. Still, openly LGBT celebrities were few and far between, Ellen notwithstanding.

In the 2000s-2010s, the queer presentation became even more prominent, with movies like “Brokeback Mountain”, “Milk” and “The Normal Heart” receiving widespread praise. Increasing mainstream acceptance paved the way for marriage equality legislation across the world, enabling millions to finally affirm their love.

Marriage equality remains a struggle in many places around the world, but supporters grow by the day. Tolerance is on the rise, especially in younger generations, and the future of LGBT people has never looked so bright. Still, in many places, legislation remains hostile, and in many others, cultural attitudes lag behind legal protections.

Discrimination is still a daily occurrence for many LGBT people simply trying to live their lives. The right of LGBT people to exist, live and love is still wielded at times like a political wedge. Other times, the modest gains of pride movements and legislation is wielded like a blunt object.

Free dating sites and the online dating revolution

In present times, technology has been the most important game-changer for LGBT dating across the world. Free dating sites have revolutionized the love scene for LGBT people, offering privacy, secrecy, anonymity, speed, and convenience. Online dating has clearly come to stay, and the LGBT community is that much better off for it.

They say that dating as an LGBT person is like getting a job: you get it online, or through referrals. There’s a reason for this modern adage. Online dating lets queer people find each other without the usual guessing games. For the first time, LGBT folks can find love without leaving the comfort of their home.

The variety and specificity are astounding as well. Between premium dating sites, free dating sites, niche online dating apps and more, the options are endless. No matter your tastes, interests or preferences, you can find what you are looking for in dating sites.

Online dating has allowed millions of people to explore their sexuality in a safe way and on their own terms. It’s a boon that cannot be overstated, despite the many maladies that naysayers like to chalk up to it.

Conclusion

In perspective, LGBT romance has come a long way to be where it is. Though the battles have been hard-fought, much work remains before we can all be free dating who we love.

Still, the progress achieved cannot be overstated, and the advent of dating sites is at the forefront of the revolution. Online dating is both a new frontier and a modern take on the bathhouse and Molly house. The plight of generations of queer folks has finally begun to produce a kinder, more tolerant world. And that is something we can all raise our glasses to.

We wouldn’t be where we are today without their sacrifice. So pay tribute to those before you, and find love on free dating sites like they never could!

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