Tired of finding love? These psychological tips will help!

By Reid

Nowadays, millions of singles from all over the world are desperately searching for their perfect partner. The solution is right there, in your hands. Check out these useful tips!

If you know the factors which affect emotions, thoughts, and behavior, you will get more chances in your love-finding journey.

1. How Would You Introduce Yourself?

Imagine you are about to write a self-introduction (which you may write in a dating app bio or a friend seeking message in a magazine). What would you write to get as many responses as possible?

According to the research in the past about self-introduction,

Men tend to search for a woman who is sympathetic, healthy, and with an attractive body. In contrast, women looking for a sympathetic, humorous, and optimistic guy.

In another research, the researchers noted that there were 3 typical ways when people wrote their self-introduction. The first one was “all about you”, these people wrote almost nothing about themselves but what their ideal partner was like. The next one was “about us” – they talked about either themselves or their potential partner. The last one was “all about me”-  they only focused on themselves. For example:

There are 3 types of introduction note "all about you", "about us" and "all about me". Which one do you prefer?
Which introduction note do you prefer?

Which one do you like? The result was remarkable.

The balance between the two aspects is the winning formula.

According to the outcome, the form with 70% “about me” and 30% “about what I’m looking for” got the highest number of responses. 

It seems like if you spend more than 70% to describe yourself, you’re self-centric. Otherwise, you are suspicious.

Additionally, women have the concept that men only care about the physical aspects of their bodies. However, the research showed men were not that superficial whereas women had few ideas about what could attract men. For instance, this introduction was written by a woman:

“A person with a cute and special character loves delicious food and wine. Looking for a tall, handsome man who is smart and has a healthy body”

In fact, men didn’t find this introduction attractive. Only 5% of them said they would respond to this message. However, women believed that this would work like a magnet in attracting men and predicted 44% of men would respond to it. 

Here is another introduction: 

“A friendly, easy-going and optimistic woman. Love relaxing, laughing and discovering the world. Always want to dance”

Once again, women thought that this would attract most of the men. Actually, only 22% said they would respond to this.

Obviously, men are able to predict whether a self-introduction was good or bad.

On average, 90% of their predictions matched the result. In the end, a piece of advice was made for women.

If you want to attract more potential guys, let a guy write a self-introduction note for you.

2. Flirting Approaches

What is your first step if you want to impress a potential dating partner? If you look around the Internet, you can discover some interesting results:

  •  “I lost my number. Could you give me yours?”
  • “If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together”

Trust me… these are useless. They cause more frustration than the impression.

In another research, the straight sexual invitation such as: 

  • “Maybe I am not Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your Bed Rock”

 or compliment like :

  • “There you are! I’ve been looking for you everywhere. My dream girl!”

These wouldn’t work although they worked before in the past. In fact, these flirtings “might be used by the men to identify the women who are not tied by social prejudice of sex”.

Besides, the failed ones usually have the old style of approaches such as:

  • “How often do you come here?”

or try to make an impression by: 

  • “I got a Master Degree in IT!”
  • “My friend is a pilot!”

For those who are skillful in the art of seduction, they always encourage their partners to talk about themselves in an unusual, humorous and strange way.

The most-rated flirting for men was:

  • “If you played in Stars In Their Eyes, who would you be?”

whereas:

  • “If you were a pizza topping, what would it be?”

was the most-rated of women, according to the research.

If you were a pizza topping, what would it be?

The flirtings which show the natural humor, easy-going character, happiness or cultural value are much more effective. Plus, the people who shared the humorous experience found their partners more attractive.

3. Pay Attention To The Topic Of Conversation

The topic of the conversation also makes an impact.  A research that was executed in the International Science Fair Edinburgh showed that talking about different topics brings a variety to the conversation and a higher chance of success to keep the interests for both parties.

When they talked about movies, less than 9% of the couples wanted to see their partner again. There was a huge gap between men women their favorite genre of movie. For instance:

Men and women don't share the same interest in movies
Men and women don’t share the same interest in movies
  • 49% of men like action movies while only 18% of women like it.
  • Only 4% of men like opera whereas 29% of women do

Conversations about travel, which tend to center around holidays and dream destinations, make people feel relaxed. As a result, they found their partner attractive.

Besides, researchers also concluded that women were faster than men in making decisions. 45% decisions of women were made in 30 seconds.

Obviously, men only have a few seconds to impress women. 

4. Heartbeat And Dating Location

In 1974, psychology professors Donald Dutton and Arthur Aron implemented special research at two bridges on Capilano River, Colombia. One bridge was high and dangerous whereas the other is low and safer. Some male adults would pass the bridges and a beautiful lady (who belongs to the experiment team) would stop them at the end of the bridge and suggest to give them her number. As predicted, the number of male adults who accepted to receive the lady’s number on the high bridge is much higher than the low one. Not only that, the number of male adults who called her was higher as well. Why is that?

Everyone knows that when people see a person who is attractive to them, their heart tends to beat faster. Dutton and Aron wondered the contrary.

If people’s heartbeat has been already fast, would they find someone attractive?

The experiment made it clear. The adults on the high and dangerous bridge had a faster heartbeat. As a result, the body tricked the brain and made it think that the lady was attractive. They absolutely wanted her number and tended to call her.

This experiment once again affirmed the supposition. If you want someone to fall in love with you, you and that person should stay away from tender music, walking in a quiet town or listening to the ring of a wind bell.

Dating in a rock show may help

Your chance of success might increase by dating in a rock show, on a sailplane or even watching a horror movie.

 

There you have them! Some psychology facts to approach a potential partner. Hopefully, they will help you make your 2019 to be the dating year that you want it to be and keep you amused and optimistic along the way. 

Stay tuned Mingle2 Blog if you’re looking for a specific piece of dating advice. Don’t forget Mingle2 – the leading dating site.

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